Wriging

The only time I hold back is when I'm angry (and not always even then.) I try to be clear with my words so I'm not misinterpreted, but I fully believe in saying what you mean and meaning what you say.

Political correctness is a disease of weak personalities. If you believe something, you shouldn't hide it. You may end up being wrong, but that's ok! We all make mistakes, and we all continue to grow and learn. You don't have to like everyone, you don't have to sugar coat things. The world isn't a very nice place all the time.

I agree with Ozone42, but sometimes I hold back for the sake of not offending a lot of people. I usually make my opinion known on certain things, but not always.

How much do you care about people that are easily offended by your opinions? Obviously you're not going to have a deep relationship of any sort with them if you differ so much and they can't tolerate the differences. I can understand being mum on topics in a work environment where your interactions will be limited to business, but on a personal level, no.

Your opinions will almost always offend someone, but I'd rather invest my time with open minded people than those who reject everything they don't like.

I held back and I regret that. Not that I was going to go off on people all the time because it went both ways. I held back saying things I liked just as much as things I didn't.

Not anymore.

The truth: it's impossible to please everyone, particularly a bunch of strangers. I found it better to be true to myself and be proud of the end result than to hold back and have regrets.

I try my hardest not to hold back. I realize the importance of being true to oneself and have always tried to live up to that (because if you don't--what is left?).

But I am a bit critical of myself to the point where I know what I want to say but I do not always have the patience to do it in the manner I would like. Maybe I think I'm not eloquent enough. Or the point-to-points don't match up. Or maybe it was just a passing thought that burned in my mind for only a moment ... just to find that I don't care to elaborate on it, 5 hours later, when I finally have time to write the post about it. Those are major things that make me "hold back" but it's not particularly the fear of offending anyone. I've certainly offended people through my blog already (if not for purely just speaking my mind and not because I was inflammatory--so IMHO it's their problem...so, tough). There are no regrets about that.

I think most people can guess my answer to this.

The only thing that occasionally stops me saying what I want to say is an attempt to be respectful to the person on the other end (though respect is not always deserved, as some may have observed in the notes in the past). If I've got something to say, I just say it. What's the point of only telling half the story?

Depends on WHERE I'm writing.

If it's on my blog, then yes... if I'm thinking it then I'm going to write it.

Here, I will typically write anything I want to, but I do hold back from time to time. Not because I am afraid of offending someone, but because this is typically a mature group of people and I expect mature discussion and if I'm acting like a mad monkey, not only am I asking of the group something I'm not willing to provide... I'm making myself look stupid.

Although I do try to not hold back from saying what's really on my mind, there are times when I realize that I've been self-censoring and not expressing my true opinions or feeling.

I guess I'm afraid of offending people – sometimes my opinions are pretty strong, and I don't want to appear like I'm trying to shove them down someone else's throat (because I hate it when people do that to me). It comes down to looking at what I'm trying to say and deciding whether the potential consequences of saying it are worth it. And honestly, there are a lot of times when I don't think it's worth it, especially on my blog where I'm aware that anything I write can easily be found by fellow students, professors, future employers, etc. It's definitely frustrating sometimes, because there are a lot of things that I'd like to write about on my blog, but I feel like I can't.

Yes and no.

The only place I don't hold back is when I blog. However, sometimes there is just too much on my mind that it becomes difficult for me to let things out because I don't know where to start.

I don't really care about offending people or getting into trouble with what I write about, simply because like plenty of personal bloggers, I've developed a way of cryptic writing that leaves the post to people's interpretation while satisfying my need to say something about it.

It's always a balance between being self critical about what you write and the self realization that what you write does have consequences. I think as a blogger at least, I've struck that balance.

I find that I write in distinctly different ways for each of my blogs. For Brotherhood of the Bean I try to keep it professional, on an even keel in my opinion and reviews. Those views might not always please the people of product I am writing about, but at least its done in a semi-professional way (emphasis on semi).

On Eleven 22 I don't hold back at all. I let my passion and emotion drive me in whatever direction that it wants to go. I needed an outlet like this, a yang to the bean's yin.

As a writer I feel like I have found a balance.

Yes, I do write what is on my mind, it is a good vent for a lot of things. However, I have learned to give it some time, like an hour or so, before I actually press the publish button. Not to change what I wrote, but to see if it might harm someone. In that case I try to inform the person about it.

I'm really hearing anadgouda about the wait an hour before publishing habit. Only I write on paper when I'm really pissed, and this prevents me from publishing something stupid. The trip from paper to computer usually involves some form of editing, and this allows me to organize and cut out parts that contribute nothing to what I'm trying to say. And the habit allows me to stop and think exactly what it is I want to say.

I find I keep two sides to me online. Or three.

On Novelr I stay professional, and by this I mean I don't rant, I don't insert personal feelings or post up stuff that can't be argued and reasoned out. This is laxed a little in my personal blog, where I talk about the things that I deal with in my life. Little funny snippets of it, really, that make it all worth living.

But you see the problem with keeping a 'personal' blog is that it's not really that personal anymore. 4 years of blogging have earned me plenty of friends who read it, and who comment whenever I write about a rough patch I'm going through. And sometimes I just want to rant, to let off steam. I could do that with friends, but all it's ever going to do is to strain our friendship. My blog used to be that punching bag, until it grew to be ... impersonal.

And so now I rant in my tumblelog. It helps, especially when I'm trying to organize my thoughts around something really bad that's happen to me, or to my friends.

Nobody reads it. And I am free to be me.

@ Ozone42:

Oh yeah the people I don't want to unnecessarily share with my opinions with are people such as a teacher, all my friends and some people I meet on the internet have a decent knowledge on my opinions.

"However, when you become and established voice on the web with your site do you start to hold back?"

Not being an "established voice" I wouldn't know that answer, but usually I don't hold back.

It's important to keep the "long tail" in mind when posting online. Whether or not a person is an "established voice" when he or she posts content, the content will still be out there years after the heat of the moment in which it was posted has passed.

This is not to say that controversy should be avoided, only that it's important to consider and manage one's personal brand when choosing what to share and how to share it. As Sara mentioned, we need to weigh the consequences of posting, not just the immediate ones, but potential future effects, as well, versus the benefits of venting.

Anadgouda's advice to wait before posting in anger is also excellent.

I often hold back because I am afraid I might hurt people's feeling when I truly say what I think. On the other hand I am entitled to my own opinion and as long as I strongly disagree with someone using proper argumentation it should be fine. But I am still in doubt, still finding my opinionated voice.

It's interesting that "holding back" and "speaking your mind" is immediately understood as ranting, insulting, criticizing.

Seems obvious but it struck me.

Not sure if I hold back. I just don't view the world in such a negative light and I don't much criticize in real life either. I try not to hurt people in real life, either.

My approach is more of walking away. If something bugs me, I'm not spending valuable time on it. See me sweating for an hour on a post about how I don't like what someone said? Don't think so.

So yeah, I say what I want; mostly ;-)

I think it really depends what kind of site you have.

I don't have a really personal site so it's hard for me to let my feelings get really involved in my writing. I review things but other than that, I don't really have many opportunities to just let it all out.

I've been kicking around the idea of starting a second blog simply to vent but I haven't had the time.